Avoid these five pitfalls of a “hellish” existence
Today at the mall, I leaned over the ledge and gazed at people passing below. I observed a security guard at a store. Belly sticking out. Oily and unkempt beard. Balding and thinning hair. Sloppily dressed. A haunting, lifeless gaze of emptiness.
I wondered what it took to become him.
What are the beliefs, habits, emotions, choices, and experiences he internalised leading him to this path?
A “hellish” existence consists of five pitfalls: fear, limiting beliefs, negative emotions, no skills, and bad habits.
1. Fear
He was afraid of failure.
Afraid of embarrassment. Afraid of change. Afraid of trying. Afraid of pain. Afraid to risk his cosy and easy lifestyle. Afraid of committing. Afraid of letting go.
Fear is the dream killer. Empowering beliefs, positive emotions, many skills, and good habits won’t matter if you’re still afraid.
2. Limiting beliefs
He believed he was not good enough.
He’s lucky to even have this job. He’s missed his chance. He’s too old to change now. It’s the best he could do. His family and teachers were right when they said he’d end up a nobody.
Beliefs have deep roots and are hard to change. Positive emotions, many skills, and good habits won’t matter if your mindset is limited.
3. Negative emotions
He was overwhelmed by his existential problems.
He was depressed and barely functioning. He was anxious about the future. He was stressed about money and about getting fired. He was lonely and craved human intimacy. He self-deprecated and felt sorry for himself. He was helpless.
Emotions direct your focus. Having skills and good habits won’t help you progress if you live in a lousy emotional state.
4. No skills
He didn’t know where to start.
How to change his life. How to change his emotional state. How to shift his mindset. How to motivate himself. How to learn. How to focus. How to earn with his mind, not with his time. How to create his compelling future. How to live.
Your skills act like a safety net you fall back on. Good habits won’t make a difference if you possess no skills.
- Learn how to manage yourself first.
- Become proficient in multiplying skills:
- Speaking, writing, psychology, sales, design, persuasion, programming.
5. Bad habits
He binge-ate processed food.
He watched too much TV to escape. He played games to gain some virtual sense of accomplishment. He avoided exercise because his muscles hurt. He took pills to help him sleep and silence his overthinking. He watched too much porn trying to feel something. He doom-scrolled social media, looking for his next dopamine hit. He drifted through life, jumping from one pleasure to another. He lacked a clear mission and purpose.
Habits are the necessary tools to craft your life. Good habits can make your future. Bad habits can ruin it.
What you do, not your feelings or your past will determine your future.
So now it’s clear.
To not end up like him, I have to avoid the five pitfalls:
- Fear.
- Limiting beliefs.
- Negative emotions.
- No skills.
- Bad habits.